Darrin vs Obama
by Rhiannon-la
Summary: One Shot. It was an English project. First chapter explains all.
1. preface

Ok, this was originally an English project. We were supposed to paraphrase the conspirator scene in Julies Caesar and then pick a theme and act it out. My group went political and a very right sided Republican decided he would lead the conspiracy against Obama (he's already been elected in our scene). It doesn't help that the lead conspirator just happens to be my boyfriend, Darrin. The characters, Coach Solis and Flounder are people who are in our school. Solis is the head football coach and very football coach-y. Flounder is a kid in the band with me. Sorry if it is confusing.

It's actually pretty funny and it may be hard to understand, but keep in mind, this is a group of 15 year old students paraphrasing it and we were working under a tight schedule. I apologize.

Oh and another thing, this was just for fun, we really do not want to assassinate the democratic candidate. I swear!


	2. Darrin vs Obama

John McCain: Hey, Sarah. Wake Up.

Sarah Palin: Ugg.

John McCain: Go make me breakfast.

Sarah Palin: Ok, I'll make you my secret Alaskan waffles. (exit Palin)

John McCain: Obama must be silenced for the good of the nation. When he's inaugurated, will he change? What if money gets involved? Should we be worried? When he gets into office, he will obtain too much power and he might abuse it. There is a fine line between mercy and power. I have never known Obama to lead with mercy. Humility is the foundation of society, but once you reach the top, the foundation crumbles. He looks down on poor people who elected him into office. He may not be bad now, but that could change, just as he says. He needs to die now, before he gets power… (enter Palin)

Sarah Palin: Here's your waffles! While I was killing a moose to make my authentic Alaskan jelly, I found a letter for you.

John McCain: Go back to bed Sarah. I have my waffles, so I'm good. What is tomorrow's date?

Sarah Palin: I don't know.

John McCain: Go look at the calendar and let me know.

Sarah Palin: Ok, I will.

John McCain: I can read it while I eat.

"Mr. McCain,

You need to understand how good of a leader you can really be."

People have been saying that a lot lately.

Sarah Palin Today is January 20, the inauguration day.

John McCain: Thank you. Is there someone at the door? I need to turn up my hearing aid.

Sarah Palin: I'll go check. (exit Palin)

John McCain: Since Darrin turned me against Obama; I haven't been able to sleep. Not even a glass of warm milk will put me to sleep. How can I revolt against my friend? Ahh, I really need to stop talking to myself. People might think I'm crazy.(slaps self) Oh, my dentures! (fixes dentures) (enter Palin)

Sarah Palin: It's your son-in-law. He would like to speak with you.

John McCain: Is he alone?

Sarah Palin: No, there are more people with him.

John McCain: Do you know them?

Sarah Palin: I can't tell. They are hiding their faces, but by the look of their attire, they are congressmen.

John McCain: Let them in. They are in the conspiracy. They can hide what they are doing to other people. I know what's "goin' down" as the youngsters today say. (enter party)

Darrin: I hope we didn't interrupt your sleep. Good morning, Mr. McCain.

John McCain: I was awake all night. Who are these people with you? Let me get my bifocals.

Darrin: Yes, you know them all. They all respect you and wish you thought higher of yourself. This is Flounder.

John McCain: He is welcome here.

Darrin: This is Coach Solis.

John McCain: He is welcome here as well.

Darrin: This is George Bush, this is Mike Huckabee, and this is Glenn Beck.

John McCain: They are all welcome. Why are you all here so early?

Darrin: We would like to talk to you.

Coach Solis: The sun's up. Why aren't we playing football?

George Bush: No…

Mike Huckabee You can see the sun through the clouds, so it must be morning. We are not playing football so it must be a good day.

George Bush: Look where I point. There is the sun, I can see it's moving toward to south. The seasons must be changing. I'm George W. Bush and I approve of this message.

John McCain: Give me your word.

Darrin: Yes, let's take an oath.

John McCain: No, our objectives are too weak and will break quickly. The rule of tyranny will continue, but if our causes are strong, then we will surely win. Let's correct the wrongdoings by making a pledge. Our mission is dire and anyone who stands in our way is no true American.

Darrin: What about Rudy Gulaini? What does he think? He will agree with us.

George Bush: Yes, we cannot forget about him.

Mike Huckabee: Of Course not.

Glenn Beck: His grey hair proves he is wise.

John McCain: Do not include him, he will not follow the plan.

Darrin: Leave him out?

George Bush: True dat.

Coach Solis: Do we kill only Obama?

Darrin: Joe Biden needs to die as well. They will die together.

John McCain: We cannot kill Biden. It is too much. Biden is just a worker, minion if you may, of Obama. We are doing this for the good of America. Biden can't do anything when Obama is gone.

Darrin: I fear Biden because he is loyal to him.

John McCain: If Biden was loyal to Obama, he would kill himself. That, however, is unlikely.

Flounder: He is not scary. We don't have to fear him.

John McCain: Look at the clock.

Darrin: It is 3 o'clock.

Flounder: Time to go.

Darrin: It is doubtful he will come today. He is very superstitious. He has to wear his lucky socks.

Coach Solis: Don't worry, we can change his mind. He likes to hear about unicorns, rainbows, and magical little elves. I will get him outside.

Darrin: No, we will all get him there.

John McCain: By noon at the latest?

Mike Huckabee: We can't screw up.

Glenn Beck: Hilary Clinton does not care for Obama since he won the nomination. Why hasn't anyone thought of her?

John McCain: Ok, Glen. Go get her and bring her here. I'll make her see our side.

Darrin: It is morning, we need to go. Remember we are the true Americans.

John McCain: Watch how you appear, do not give us away. See you all tomorrow. (exit all but McCain) Sarah is fast asleep. You don't have worries, so enjoy it now.


End file.
